Full Uses

Dear Fellow SEBTS students:

I gave my third official sermon ever last Sunday, and it gives me ever greater conviction and confirmation that I am moving in the right direction in my preparations to become a more educated preacher and give my life to preaching, and try not to worry about how I might feed and educate my five offspring.

Actually, I do not worry so much about that, and have not in the past, either. Only, my wife does, and always has throughout our fourteen years together. I must love my wife, and temper my decisions with her in mind, so though I have worked hard to learn Korean language since coming here, thinking it right that God would one day have me in North Korea to serve spreading His Word, I have to realize that my wife's needs are not be ridden over in roughshod fashion.

This takes some doing, I think, for a man, to admit that he must alter plans of his which he thought worthy and good. I still study Korean, each Sunday morning, early, and it still feels good. And I just trust God that He will have a way (which is not currently evident to me) to use my ability in this regard. I do not feel that I am pig-headed in continuing to study Korean. Rather, it is done with much pleasure, and a sense of ease in freedom that I had not before.

I have been moved by President Akin's messages of late, where he has emphasized that we Southern Baptists need to move out of our Bible Belt realm, to cities in the West and North. He mentioned Phoenix being very underrepresented. Phoenix, AR, is dry and not too cold, which would be good for my wife, who is handicapped and cannot walk much due to early onset arthritis (exacerbated by giving birth to five babies). I thought then that may be a good place to raise our children up to the point where they are independent, before we move on, to North Korea, if that is in God's plans. I felt some comfort in that, as before I had felt that any bit of compromise I made on this issue, preparing myself to serve in North Korea would be undesirable, and somehow dishonest of me. But now I don't feel that way anymore.

I believe that God has full uses for me where I can also properly care for my wife and children. Getting the children a good English-based education has been a strong point for my wife over the years, and it has not been clear whether and where we might be able to afford that. Now it seems more likely, as soon as we can get funding to move to SEBTS, and thereafter, perhaps in a public school system where I serve, maybe even Phoenix.

Love, Nathaniel